Hey, hey, my runner friend. Today we are going to focus on what to do when you feel judged for running slowly.
When you don’t have a small body or you don’t have a typical runner’s looking body and on top of that you feel like you’re plodding along or that everybody else is faster than you, of course, you’re gonna assume that everybody else is thinking you look ridiculous and that you shouldn’t be running and you should be embarrassed and all the things right. How could they possibly have any other opinion? But is that actually true? Let’s dive in!
What You’ll Learn From This Episode:
- What to do when you feel judged for running slowly
- How to reframe other’s opinions…and your own
Listen to the Full Episode:
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Full Episode Transcript:
Welcome to the Not Your Average Runner podcast. If you’ve never felt athletic, but you still dream about becoming a runner, you are in the right place. I’m Jill Angie, and I help fat women over 40 to start running, feel confident and change their lives. I have worked with thousands of women to help them achieve their running goals.
And now I want to help you.
Hey there, runner. Are you ready to warm up your body and mind for this run? All right, let’s go you start walking and I’ll start talking. So today’s topic was a listener suggestion about thinking that you’re being judged for running slowly…judged by other people around you or actually maybe people who just know your pace and have thoughts about it And I get it right because You know, when you don’t have a small body, you don’t have that typical runner’s looking body and on top of that you feel like you’re plodding along or that everybody else is faster than you. Of course, you’re gonna assume that everybody else is thinking you look ridiculous and that you shouldn’t be running and you should be embarrassed and all the things right How could they possibly have any other opinion?
Well, here’s the thing. You know, yeah, there might be people out there who think those things. In fact, there probably are. People have all kinds of opinions about everything. You could be on the cover of People magazine as the world’s sexiest woman, and there will be people who are like, Ugh, I cannot stand her face.
She’s the worst. Right? What is that saying? Opinions are like assholes. Everybody’s got one. Yeah. So instead of trying to convince you that no, of course nobody thinks you’re slow and you shouldn’t be running, let’s just assume, yeah, there are people who think that about you. And so what? Right? Who cares?
There will also be plenty of people who think you are inspirational and aspirational. People who wish that they could do what you do. People who don’t even notice your pace or your body, or they just say, Oh look, a runner. Right? It’s probably the vast majority of people. There are going to be people who cheer you on verbally and say, Hey, keep on going.
And you’ll have opinions about that. There will be people who cheer you on silently and you will never know. Okay. And honestly, you will have far more people thinking positive things about you than negative. But again, so what? Who cares? Because what really matters is what you think. That is the only opinion we are interested in because your opinion is the only one that can influence your actions.
I mean this deeply, right? You think other people’s opinions can stop you from doing what you want? No. They cannot. Even if somebody comes up to you, stops you from running, they stand in front of you, and they say, hey fatty, you’re too slow, you should be embarrassed of yourself. The only way that opinion can hurt you, the only way that that can stop you from running, is if you believe it.
I’m serious about this. Imagine if someone came up to you while you’re running. They stood in front of you and they said Your blue hair is really ugly. You should be embarrassed of yourself and go home And if you don’t have blue hair, you’d be like, huh? Friend did you forget to take your meds this morning?
Do you need to have your eyes checked? I do not have blue hair And their opinion about your hair would not matter because there’s not even a tiny iota of you that believes it. You would just literally run around them and maybe kind of give them a weird look and keep going. It is the exact same thing with opinions about your pace or your body or whatever else you think people are thinking about you.
Okay, the only reason it matters to you is because on some level you believe it and that is what bothers you. That is what gets in your way because you are judging yourself and then someone else has the same opinion and you’re like, see, it’s all true. Nobody actually cares if you’re slow, but you, okay? I know this is, we all think we are the main characters of everything, but really nobody cares if you’re slow.
Seriously. They might think you’re slow, but they don’t care. They don’t actually care. You see somebody, imagine this, you see somebody on the subway and they’re wearing a really unusual outfit and you think, okay, wow, that was an interesting choice. I would not have left the house wearing that. But also you don’t fucking care because someone else’s outfit does not impact you, right?
You think your thought, maybe you Rudely, I think it’s rude when people do this, but I know people do this. Maybe you take a little picture send to your bestie and be like, oh my god, look what I saw on the subway today, right? But you think your thought and you move on with your day When you are running in public and you are slow People might think wow She’s slow And then they move on with their day, right?
Because you are not the main character in anybody else’s life. People just don’t care, right? They just aren’t interested. It’s like a little bit of a blip and then they move on. And here’s the most important thing because we can’t prove what other people are thinking. So from your perspective, all of these opinions are imaginary.
You don’t know what anyone is thinking. They might be looking at you and making a face because their partner just broke up with them or they got in a fight with their boss or who knows, like you don’t know what somebody is thinking. And just because. Someone’s eyes are pointed in your direction and there is an expression on their face.
It doesn’t mean it has anything to do with you. But what we do is we take whatever we are thinking about ourselves and we project it into somebody else’s mind and we’re like, see, look at that. Everybody thinks I suck. So unless somebody actually says words to you out loud about your pace, which I can assure you is extremely rare.
Unless you’re talking to your like shitty brother in law. At a party and he, he asks you like, well, how long time, how much time did it take you to run your last 5k marathon? And you tell him and he’s like, oh wow, that’s really slow. Right? His opinion doesn’t matter because also he’s probably not a runner.
But unless somebody actually says those words to you out loud, and again, it’s rare. You have no idea what somebody’s thinking about you, especially if you are out in public running amongst strangers. Transcribed It is so unlikely. That a anyone cares about you and be anybody’s gonna say anything to you.
So getting all stressed out Because other people think you’re slow is kind of hilarious because you honestly don’t even know it’s if it’s true, right? It’s like Stressing out that, oh my gosh, the world might be flat, and I could possibly fall off the edge, so I better not go to Iceland, right? It’s like, you don’t, you don’t know if it’s true, it’s probably not true, so like, getting stressed out about this imaginary shit, don’t even, don’t even bother it.
So I want you to keep all of this in your mind today on your run and notice how many times do you judge yourself for your pace and Then project those thoughts on the people around you. Okay? Remember that what they are thinking is Even if they agree with you, is none of your business, because it doesn’t impact you in the slightest, okay?
Don’t let the imaginary thoughts of people dictate what you do with your life. Work on your own opinions about yourself, because that’s where you’re going to get traction. That’s what’s going to make you successful. Make progress as a runner. It’s what’s going to keep you consistent and it’s going to keep you feeling a lot happier about yourself.
Okay. All right. I believe in you, my friend, turn on that interval timer and let’s go
real quick before you go. If you enjoyed listening to this episode, you have to check out my seven day jumpstart plan. It is a free downloadable guide that will teach you exactly how to start running safely and confidently in the body you have right now. Head on over to notyouraveragerunner.com/jumpstart to grab it.
That’s notyouraveragerunner.com/jumpstart. I’d love to be a part of your journey.
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